Sunday, July 18, 2010

I Stink at Saying Goodbye


Today was the Going Away Party for Eric's brother Ryan. He and the girls are moving to Spain next week...Barcelona! Most likely while we'll be in Florida. It occurred to me too late that this was probably the last time I'll see them until Christmas. I debated even going to this wingding. But I Needed to see them one more time, and I wanted the boys to play with Alexis and Kaylee. Sam and Alexis were playing on the stairs together. Sam won't say Alexis or Kaylee, we tried to get him to say their names, but he just won't even try. He just looks at me, like really woman, how about something easy like Go? It makes me sad that by the time they see him again he'll be saying their names. And Chris just runs wild, he was all over the place, but he LOVES to play with his cousins, today he was having a great time with his cousins and their friends pretending he was a knight running wild with a sword. Aren't the cousins so Sweet together?!

I hate Goodbyes.

I hate saying them, I hate what they mean, just hate them. I mean, I'm excited for them and all, they've been dangling on a string for 6 months as Ryan has been doing rotations in Spain, leaving the girls here. It's been Icky for all parties, so I'm happy that at last they'll all be together. But there's a major Selfish factor in that I think I'd rather have them here. I try to keep my heart and eyes on the positives, of which there are many, on one hand I'm So Excited for them, but today,tonight, I just feel sad. I didn't even know what I was going to say when presented with saying goodbye. The party was so busy, I didn't hear many sad sappy goodbyes being said. I suppose if I'd even started to try, I'd have burst into tears. Luckily, or unluckily, depending on how you look at it, I had to high tail it out of the party with boys that were melting down in need of sleep, so my goodbyes were waved. I didn't even get to sit and chill with Ryan and Amy today, and that makes me feel bad, not that I would've known much what to say. I've just been leaky eyed all evening. Did I mention I hate goodbyes? And the words just haven't been coming to me.

But sometimes in just the act of a wave and a blown kiss goodbye to someone you love, perhaps words don't even need to be said.


SuperSillyAunt said...

It's not goodbye, it's see you later. You handled things perfectly, no worries, no regrets.