Monday, October 5, 2009

Scheduling the Fun

It's weird. As the boys get older, our calendar fills so quickly. I was so excited when I realized this year, that Chris would have Mondays off from school. He'd be able to play with his friends. I had visions of lazy mornings, and playdates. Picnics and the Zoo.... And I couldn't wait for us to play like we did this summer, or last year, just do what we want, when we wanted. But it's not working.
The crummy thing is that we just Can't run on the spur of the moment like we used to. A friend would call and say, wanna do lunch at xyz, or meet at the zoo, and we'd just go. Now if I do that, everything becomes rushed, because if we're not eating by 11:30 or 12, then I don't make it back in time for naps. Our leisurely mornings are out the window. Sam may be doing his own thing and not ready to just fly off, but he's really the easier of the two boys. Chris can make getting dressed really easy, or really difficult. Today was a difficult day. And then lunch was later than usual for us, because we dilly-dallied, letting the kids play rather than get moving by a reasonable hour, I should've listened to my instincts, and by the time we got home at 2:45, Chris had melted down twice and was refusing a nap. It wasn't pretty.

Did you ever watch Family Ties? Do you remember that episode where the girls all go to a cabin to go bonding, and they end up fighting? The Mom finally screams, "JUST SIT DOWN AND SHARE THE JOY!!!!" Everytime we get ready to go somewhere, whether it's go on a play date or to school, or a class, I end up feeling like that Mom. A lot lately.

I feel like I'm being callous by scheduling play dates 3 weeks out. Like I think so much of myself that I have to be Miss Social Calendar...that's not it. I miss my friends. I want to see them. I enjoy having drinks, or doing lunch. I don't get the opportunity to see them without the kids, and its good for them to be out and socialized. I want Chris to have time to run around, run free in a garden (goodness knows he can't do it in our yard) and to play with his friends. But let's say hypothetically, I find a grassy knoll for him to get crazy on, I can't relinquish control enough to let him get crazy, lest he hurt himself or someone else. Toss in there that now that Chris is in school, but I don't feel comfortable leaving Brownsburg on the days he's in school, or going much further than the west side on other days. I went across town on a dev. preschool day and cut it so close that I pulled in Right behind the bus, they had already been to my door and were walking Chris back to the bus. Scared me. And I find that naps are so Vital around here, (not just for the boys, but for me too!) that our world stops at 1 o'clock. I can push it to 2, but apparently not 3. If we go too far away, I'm learning that the boys think that a 20 minute power nap in the car qualifies as a Nap to them. And it just Doesn't.
So, I'm sorry if I don't want to go more than 20 minutes away. And I'm sorry if I have to Schedule the Fun, and I'm sorry if it sounds goofy to pencil in our playdates on the calendar for weeks out, I want to play and scheduling it in is the only way we can do it, and that I'm sorry I just can't run away on the spur of the moment anymore. Maybe we'll get back to those like 2024.


SuperSillyAunt said...

And if your boys are at all like my girls, then Mondays are Monster Mondays anyway. The days when you can play at a drop of a hat are soon on their way...too quickly some would say. I rarely see the girls anymore after school is over because they are busy playing with friends.

Andrea said...

I don't think it's that big of a deal to schedule playdates a few weeks out. We do the same thing. When you are juggling multiple schedules, that's just how it goes. Luckily most of my friends are also juggling multiple schedules (or are at least understanding) so we're all in the same boat. :)

Cathy said...

I guess I'm just not used to scheduling a playdate 3 weeks out. It's weird to me.