Friday, January 7, 2011

Feeling 12

My new year's resolution to join a gym has proven a little bit harder than I originally intended. I wanted to join a gym. But I didn't want to go alone.
So I went Monday morning with my friend Ems to take the boys to the Pilates class at the church that was advertised with child care, only they didn't have it when we got there. They only had it twice in a week, but the facility was clean and nice. I debated going elsewhere but when I researched other places, they were lots more expensive, and I would still have to pay child care over and above.
And I don't want to go alone. I want to have someone with me to talk to, laugh with. I had a couple friends show interest, but no one could accompany me. So Wednesday night, I wanted to go to their Yoga class. But I really didn't want to go by myself. I was surprised at how I got nervous walking up there, All By Myself. Well, not Alone, I had the boys. But they went willingly into their corresponding playrooms.
I did too, and I was a bit proud of myself that I did, I went By Myself!
I realize how silly it sounds. I feel like I'm back in middle school. But there's some comfort in not making a fool out of yourself alone. And I didn't recognize a soul inside. But I was OK. Fine even. Had a Good Time. I worked up a nice sweat, stretched in great ways I haven't done in a While. Smiles were exchanged with my neighbors, and the teacher said a prayer afterwards. I didn't exactly fit in, but I might..eventually.
The funniest was that my sweatpants kept falling down, and I was hiking them up the whole time. Note to self: stretchy waistband not a tie. I kept looking around at what the other girls were wearing. I felt like a teenager, what are the Cool Kids wearing?
Initially I felt out of place, it seemed like a sea of women who knew exactly what they were doing. I wasn't as bendy as the gals that surrounded me, but I wasn't alone in needing some easier modifications. And that was comforting, that I wasn't alone. Is it crazy that I don't want to do this alone? I know there's gals out there, big girls that want to change their health situation like I do, but it's kind of hard to take this step alone, and especially when we're so physically unprepared, aka out of shape. I'm really Blessed that even though I don't have someone going with me, I have lots of Cheerleaders routing for me and supporting from afar. That makes it easier.
The boys had such a great time, Chris cried monster tantrums when it was time to go. That could've been because his friends Bryn and Shay were there too. I take it as a sign to go back, so I'm going to, This Morning. And I'm going to join. Whether or not I have cohorts in crime.
I can do this!


Rachel said...

I saw an Old Navy ad last night: yoga pants for $12. You might try those. Target sells some, too, from Champion.

SuperSillyAunt said...

I hate doing stuff alone. I always used to make Val tag along when I was younger, but luckily now I have kids to drag along :o)

Carrie said...

Keep it up girlfriend!!! I am also on a quest to finally get rid of the rest of the Brett weight. So, I'll be your cheerleader if you'll be mine :)