Sunday, January 4, 2009

Ch. 4 The Mommy Diaries

Odd that I should finish Chapter 4 on this week. The questions gave me a lot to ponder.

1. When was the last time you asked for help? I've been blessed with a group of friends and family that are in touch enough to know when help is needed. When Chris had his Feeding Tube surgery last May, and I was asked if there was anything our MOPS friends could do, I said yes, please bring food. From our previous surgeries, we would come home, and the last thing we felt like doing was cooking. All we wanted to do was sleep, and then our bellies growling would wake us. It is such a load off to not worry about that. Chris, with all his issues, and even getting pregnant with him required support. Even this week, being in "isolation" because he MAY have Whooping Cough I received multiple offers for help. The Sweetest Offer was from one friend offered to run errands and drop supplies off with a "secret knock" so as not to get possibly exposed to our cooties.

2. How hard is it for you to ask for help? What do you think holds you back? Well, it used to be harder for me. Pride was an obstacle, but not so much now. But since Chris, I've found that in letting others help me, help us, they get a blessing too. For not only is it a gift to recieve, but also to give. And by asking for help, or letting someone who wishes to help us when we need it, we are Letting them Give to us, and that's a gift too. Some folks that have offered help to us were merely acquaintances, now they're family. And they get to see Chris's light. Christopher's name means Christ-bearer, and he does that. It's his Gift from God really, he has this light, and those that know him get to witness the miracle that he is. You know how they say, it takes a village to raise a child. He's a child that really has a village that helps.

3. Oftentimes failure to seek out aid from someone else stems from an issue of pride. What has got you thinking you are capable of handling it all on your own? Funny how that last part practically yells to me, DOLT! Don't you know God is in control and you are NEVER ALONE?! Yes, I used to have Pride. Now I don't have pride in things that I juggle, because I'm a terrible juggler. I have pride when someone says to me, Chris is a great boy, or in spite of everything, he's thriving. God Gives me all I have, and it's not so much pride but gratefulness and a recognition of those blessings from above that I carry now instead of pride.

4. Do you view offers of help as debts you must pay off as quickly as possible? No. More like, there's a running tally of those in my head that jumped to help us out, and now I know that They are people I can count on in a time of need. Like, creating a list of who to ask when there's a big favor, or people to let know that Chris needs prayer, the people I can count on as our prayer warriors and helpers. Also, there's the concept of Pay It Forward. By accepting help with Chris so early on, and recognizing what a blessing it was, I try to help out and offer help to others when it is possible.

5. What will it take for you to view the help you receive as acts of grace with no return favors expected? This one doesn't really apply to me in the way of viewing them, because I see these offers as grace-filled Gifts, and perhaps not with return favors expected, but maybe I just want to remember to pass it on. When that person is in need, to remember that they helped and I'll try to help too, or pass on the help. It actually happened this year to some folks at church (Sometimes people know us because we're in the choir, but sometimes we only know their faces, so the entire church adopted Chris)this a family who I hadn't met formally until they brought food when Chris was born. I got to know them through that gift. Then this year, their daughter got a benign brain tumor that had to be removed and was in the hospital for a while. Having been there, done that, we stopped by with a care package. In this case it wasn't so much a case of 'well, they brought me food, I should bring them something because I owe them' but more of a case of remember how I felt, remember what I needed, they are our friends now and how can I help them?


Unknown said...

I'm so impressed with your work with this book. I just cleaned out my nightstand last night (to find room for more books...) and found my copy. I need to get back into it...after I get caught up on my new year's resolution!