Friday, November 6, 2009

Over Coffee

This week has been a rough week. I'm not usually happy to see a week end, But this one, I think so. Lately Eric has been so busy on weekends, that I'm just as lonely on the weekend, made more stressful because Chris doesn't get the added bonus of going to school. Today, while we were outside waiting for the bus, the neighbor came by and said, "You know that tere is no school today". Oops. That has sort of been my luck this week. I've just been such a jumble of emotions lately. And my back is acting up. It's exhausting and I can't sleep.
First, we found out that Eric's brother is getting a super awesome Promotion in Spain. Barcelona. They'll be there for 2 years. I'm going to miss them So Much! On one hand I'm jealous, I wanna go, I spent a good chunk of my school career studying Spanish, the art, the history, the language. It would so AWESOME to go to Spain. On the other hand I'm losing my Girls. Ryan too, but really my Girls. It's so SAD that they are leaving. They are 10 minutes away, we had it timed including getting kids in the car. We may not drive it as much as we could, but its so nice to know they're right there. Spain is SO far away. But on the other hand, its only 2 years. I can speak from experience being away from the family for 2 years is Doable. And they assured us they were coming home for major holidays. But still, I got teary listening to the birthday song when they celebrated Kaylee's birthday at school this week, I won't get to hear it again for a long long time. On the other hand, WOOHOO for the girls! What an opportunity! Like my neices weren't smart enough already, let's get them Bilingual and Cultured. It's a lot of highly emotional hands, see the jumble.
Another thing this week was realizing the loss of my friend Kelly. She's been gone 6 months, but I think the hardest thing has been that there isn't anyone around here that I talk to regularly that knew here like I did to mourn with me. Eric did, but he's hardly been home. I look around our home and see signs of her; the picture frame she gave me as a wedding gift, the picture of our wedding party hanging in the living room. When I hear a song by the Four Seasons or Chicago, or see anything about the Lion King.
Even when I drink a cup of coffee I think of her. I hated coffee when I met her. She worked in a coffee shop, and she tried to get me to drink it, to like it, but I wouldn't. I always loved the smell, but hated the taste. So she brought me in Slow. She'd get us these fancy cocoas. Oh they were so good.

I have a tub of the Butter Rum cocoa in my cabinet, I found them at the Cheese Shop. Kelly would whip them up for us on a chilly day, or bring back a stash of sample packets whenever she went home or worked over a break. She'd try to make me a cocoa and put a smidge of coffee in it. Sugary and sweet enough that I didn't notice. It worked. By the time my sister started working at Starbucks, I had a vague tolerance of coffee. At least I could add enough milk and sugar to it to drink it. Now I find them enjoyable, irrisistable even.
This week, Amy and I went for drinks at Starbucks, got to sample their holiday wares.
Welcome back Gingerbread Latte.

There's something therapeutic about a warm beverage, with sugar and caffeine, I think they have magical powers, these fancy spiced drinks like the gingerbread, pumpkin spice, or chai lattes, they make my pain a little less, both physical and emotional. And like this week, when it was accompanied by conversations with a good friend, well it was just Good. After my cup of coffee with Amy, I felt better, the world felt a little smaller, the time just a flash in the pan, and my heart hurt a lot less. Now if Starbucks only had a playground so the kids could play while I drink, I would never go anywhere else.


SuperSillyAunt said...

You know, at first I thought you were saying you were "over coffee" in done with it. Now that would be something terrible! Ok, I'm joking...I really didn't think that, but it's funny right?